Grief
by chickadeebabe
Summary: One-Shot* She knew that the pain would lessen in time, but she just wondered... how long would it take for her broken heart to stop aching? Marinette/Tadashi.


She could feel Hiro's stare, her hold on his hand tightening and she forces herself to smile down at him. She didn't want him to see how broken up she was inside. How she wanted to scream out as she stared at **his** casket. The one **he** shouldn't even be here right now. None of them should be here.

Not Cass, speaking about **him** and saying that **he** should have lived a long and fulfilling life.

Not Hiro, who, just like her, didn't want to believe that any of this was real and that this was a vile nightmare that they both wanted to wake up from.

Not Alya, who stood by her side and held onto her in case she was to fall out from her deep despair.

Definitely not the gang, who stood behind all three of them and stared at **his** casket as if they expected **him** to jump out and claim that it was all a joke. Marinette would have wanted that than to face the fucked-up reality that **he** was gone and that she hadn't been able to save **him**. She was god damned hero! She was Ladybug! Wasn't she supposed to be miraculous?! Wasn't she supposed to protect the people that she cared for?!

Then... then... why wasn't she able to get to the building in time? Why hadn't she stayed with them? Why...? Just why..?

"Mari... it's time." Marinette looked up to her best friend and nodded, not even trying to force a smile for Alya. She looked back down at the youngest Hamada and, squeezing his hand once more, let go of him and leaned on Alya. They walked up to the podium and Marinette kept her gaze locked on Cass's. She would not look at that casket, she just wouldn't.

When she made it to the podium next to Cass, she thanked Alya silently and took the offered hand of the oldest Hamada. She stared out the crowd, picking out friends and family, and then lowered her eyes to the mic.

It was... funny.

Before she came up she had a vague thought of what to say and how to say it without breaking down and now? Blank. Pure hollowness.

'That big brain of yours empty again?'

Her eyes widened as she heard **his** voice and she felt everything in her just want to collapse. She didn't want to do this! She shouldn't have to! **He** wasn't dead! He wasn't about be buried... into the ground... **he**... **he** was going to be right at the cafe... **he** was...

'It'll be alright little lady... just breathe and speak. Understand? Breathe and speak.'

Marinette shook her head to try and rid herself of the voice. She didn't need to speak because this was all just a bad dream. She would wake up and she would walk to Neko Cafe with Alya, Honey, and GoGo and they would all talk about their daily life and the recent drama on the news, and they would tease Hiro about his little crush on Tip, and then she'd be trying to control her breathing when **he** came to serve them.

She'd do anything to go back to those times. She'd endure Fred and his constant talk of invisible sandwiches, she'd let Chloe say all the insults she wanted to her, she'd even tell **him** how she felt! She just...

'You trust me, right?'

She looked up to the people waiting patiently and nodded lightly.

'Then trust me and trust yourself. I've never given up on you, so please don't give up on yourself, okay? You can do this. I know you can Marinette.'

Marinette stood still for a few moments. She lifted her head slowly and she brought the mic closer to her as she finally spoke.

"My name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng." She started, "I go to college not far from San Fransokyo Institute. I also am a family friend of the Hamada family and I... I..." She covered her moist eyes with her hands and she leaned into the shoulder of Cass as the older woman held her close as she tried to regain her composure. She didn't need to lift her head to know that people were giving her pitiable and depressed gazes as she sobbed her heart out up there.

Tadashi was wrong! He was so wrong, she couldn't do this! She couldn't! She thought she could and Marinette psyched herself, but it didn't even matter in the end cause she was back to square one. Hurting and breaking and trying to fix herself though even she knew it was too early for that.

Nothing could really heal a broken heart. Nothing, but time.


End file.
